Castineman
Tricycle
11/10/17 Coatepec, Mexico
Coffee country. Everywhere you go you smell it. I'm at a small cafe, in the back courtyard. I am the only one here. I am drinking a cappuccino. I am alone and can't enjoy things as I know I should. It's that pervasive fear that I talked about last time. It'll pass but I don't get it. The constant feeling as if the rest of the world is working and I am sitting in a cafe in Mexico wondering; wondering what the rest of you are doing. You as in the world. What do you all do? How do you all feel? Do you feel like I do? I don't think so. How can I have everything I wanted and planned for feel so empty. Like I said; it'll pass. In the meantime I'm going to write all of you, yes, you, the world. I'm going to continue to let you know what's going on with me because I certainly don't get it myself.
So I wander these small streets in Coatepec and continue to wonder what the people are doing and why. Is it the drive of the human spirit that keeps us moving no matter what? Why do they have scraps of meat guts out on a table in front of their shops? Why do they throw their garbage anywhere and everywhere. It's a gorgeous place and everywhere you see garbage. As I motorcycle down these beautiful roads I see places where they've dumped a truckload of garbage at the side of the road and am disgusted at the disregard of the people who dump the crap there.
The antithesis is the Ashram. Yes, I made it there yesterday. I thought I was hopelessly lost in Xalapa figuring I missed one of the mysterious signs that never appear when you need them. Then, when I was wondering if I had to do another about face and try again there it was, the sign for Coatepec. I am now making sure I always have a plan B up my sleeve. Despite the fear of getting rear ended or side swiped at any moment in this traffic I will continue. I keep going. I find it inside myself not to give up. Then it works out. I find myself in Coatepec, another Mexican comes to my aid knowing I am lost and tells me where there is an internet cafe on the beautiful square. The Mexican people continue to be kind and friendly. Next thing I know am sitting drinking great, cheap cappuccino and finding out how to get to the ashram on my Iphone.
The Ashram recycles! The people at the ashram are fantastic. They speak English. They invited me for the birthday celebration of the Maestro. I meditated and I did it. For perhaps the first time I really meditated. Then I was invited to pizza and a movie, a very special celebration.
As to the ride. Yesterday couldn't have been more ideal. I left the hotel. The bike was secured in the hotel garage down the street. I packed; a job that is getting faster everyday. Asked directions in Spanish and understood them. Got right on the road and was on the beach after riding through orange groves and lush tropical vegetation. I had planned to camp but I was feeling too rested to stop and the beaches were not too impressive. So I continued on the see if I could make Xalapa or the Ashram. Along the way I saw a road leading to a huge lighthouse. I followed the road. Almost dumped the bike in some hidden sand. What a save that was . It was close! A feat of fear laden prowess that had me congratulating myself at its mastery. So I parked the bike on a bluff above the ocean after meeting some ugly, chained up dogs closer to the Lighthouse. They must be put there to scare off intruders like me. The vista was amazing. The ocean beating against the sand and the rocks below was incredible. The wild nature of the coast was breathtaking. I wanted to camp but wasn't sure how badly I was trespassing so I continued.on towards Xalapa. Along the route I saw a weathered entranceway to a ruin. It was at the foot of a shear Peak that looked like a volcano had blown up and left a shard of itself as proof of its former magnificence. The site was a Totonic necropolis and had played a part in history from its hay-day till Cortez and his men put a stop to its importance. Small monuments shaped like miniature Pyramids festooned the place. Four of them were atop a higher terrace. The whole place had a magical feeling of awe as it looked out over the sea.
QUIAHUIZTLAN, VERACRUZ, MEXICO
11/11/17 Coatepec, Mexico, The Zacolo
Nightmares, bad stomach, early morning angst have given way to a beautiful day. I have had way to much good coffee. I attend my last yoga class today. At 7pm there is meditation. Then it's off to prepare for tomorrow's travel to Oaxaca. I go through the mountains tomorrow. It should be an interesting day. I will stay in Oaxaca through my birthday. My 60th. Lots of stuff rummaging through my mind right now. It is almost impossible to stay in the moment. The future looms large. The trip i s not half over. I do not know which road to take home. I want to avoid the megapolis of Mexico City but how to do this is yet a mystery. Teotihuacan is just outside the city so I will get close but if I find a way I'll avoid the place. I will not go back the way I came till I hit Texas. Then it's to Florida and Alex (my brother) in Sarasota. If all goes well I'll leave the bike there and fly home.
Here's what I've learned so far. As much as my uncertainty is ever present I find I can accomplish anything if I keep my wits and maintain patience. I'm glad I don't drink. This trip would have seemed easier if I had been drinking but I would have easily put myself in jeopardy had I done so. Yes the trials and tribulations have been difficult but drinking over them would have temporarily soothed the savage beast but it would have taken its toll on my well being and physical strength which I need to ride the bike. There is a huge difference between riding a motorcycle here and driving. In a car you have less to worry about. You are are encapsulated. On a bike you feel everything. You see everything. You are more aware of the dangers and the beauty. An 8 hour day on a bike in Mexico is much more a test of wits than driving a car.
Tomorrow I leave the ashram. I will be sad to leave but don't feel the compulsion to stay. When I travel it always seems like there's too much more to see. To sit and rest doesn't seem like an option. I'm never on vacation when I'm on vacation. It takes up all my time to figure things out the way I travel. I mean to find the ashram, which costs $15 per day and includes breakfast and lunch, one has to work for it. But the rewards are great. I stayed three days at the ashram. A record for me. I plan on really staying awhile in Oaxaca. At least till my birthday. Hopefully longer. I must quench the thirst to blast home. I am homesick as hell but I needn't be. Nothing there will have changed. It'll be cold. I'll have to cut and split wood. Figure out how to make some money and plan for the next trip. This trip was a precursor to others.
Last night during meditation it was clear that I had to cut this trip short. Not only am I running short of the energy it takes to deal with fearsome roads and traffic but I saw clearly that my next move is to finish my house. I made enough money this summer to pay for this trip. So this first experiment is just that, an experiment. Now the goal is clear, do it again but better. Hence the desire to get home. Every day I stay here is more money I could spend on the house. If I play my cards right I can finish the house with the money I have left. Again the future is always a dream. It is a shadow it can never be touched because once you touch the future it becomes the present.
Right now the present is awesome. Another nice cafe. Good coffee and three empanadas for $5. Right on the square. I know as soon as I get home I'll want to be back here. That's the trick to traveling the way I do; I scare myself half to death then its over and I want to do it again.
Coffee country. Everywhere you go you smell it. I'm at a small cafe, in the back courtyard. I am the only one here. I am drinking a cappuccino. I am alone and can't enjoy things as I know I should. It's that pervasive fear that I talked about last time. It'll pass but I don't get it. The constant feeling as if the rest of the world is working and I am sitting in a cafe in Mexico wondering; wondering what the rest of you are doing. You as in the world. What do you all do? How do you all feel? Do you feel like I do? I don't think so. How can I have everything I wanted and planned for feel so empty. Like I said; it'll pass. In the meantime I'm going to write all of you, yes, you, the world. I'm going to continue to let you know what's going on with me because I certainly don't get it myself.
So I wander these small streets in Coatepec and continue to wonder what the people are doing and why. Is it the drive of the human spirit that keeps us moving no matter what? Why do they have scraps of meat guts out on a table in front of their shops? Why do they throw their garbage anywhere and everywhere. It's a gorgeous place and everywhere you see garbage. As I motorcycle down these beautiful roads I see places where they've dumped a truckload of garbage at the side of the road and am disgusted at the disregard of the people who dump the crap there.
The antithesis is the Ashram. Yes, I made it there yesterday. I thought I was hopelessly lost in Xalapa figuring I missed one of the mysterious signs that never appear when you need them. Then, when I was wondering if I had to do another about face and try again there it was, the sign for Coatepec. I am now making sure I always have a plan B up my sleeve. Despite the fear of getting rear ended or side swiped at any moment in this traffic I will continue. I keep going. I find it inside myself not to give up. Then it works out. I find myself in Coatepec, another Mexican comes to my aid knowing I am lost and tells me where there is an internet cafe on the beautiful square. The Mexican people continue to be kind and friendly. Next thing I know am sitting drinking great, cheap cappuccino and finding out how to get to the ashram on my Iphone.
The Ashram recycles! The people at the ashram are fantastic. They speak English. They invited me for the birthday celebration of the Maestro. I meditated and I did it. For perhaps the first time I really meditated. Then I was invited to pizza and a movie, a very special celebration.
As to the ride. Yesterday couldn't have been more ideal. I left the hotel. The bike was secured in the hotel garage down the street. I packed; a job that is getting faster everyday. Asked directions in Spanish and understood them. Got right on the road and was on the beach after riding through orange groves and lush tropical vegetation. I had planned to camp but I was feeling too rested to stop and the beaches were not too impressive. So I continued on the see if I could make Xalapa or the Ashram. Along the way I saw a road leading to a huge lighthouse. I followed the road. Almost dumped the bike in some hidden sand. What a save that was . It was close! A feat of fear laden prowess that had me congratulating myself at its mastery. So I parked the bike on a bluff above the ocean after meeting some ugly, chained up dogs closer to the Lighthouse. They must be put there to scare off intruders like me. The vista was amazing. The ocean beating against the sand and the rocks below was incredible. The wild nature of the coast was breathtaking. I wanted to camp but wasn't sure how badly I was trespassing so I continued.on towards Xalapa. Along the route I saw a weathered entranceway to a ruin. It was at the foot of a shear Peak that looked like a volcano had blown up and left a shard of itself as proof of its former magnificence. The site was a Totonic necropolis and had played a part in history from its hay-day till Cortez and his men put a stop to its importance. Small monuments shaped like miniature Pyramids festooned the place. Four of them were atop a higher terrace. The whole place had a magical feeling of awe as it looked out over the sea.
QUIAHUIZTLAN, VERACRUZ, MEXICO
11/11/17 Coatepec, Mexico, The Zacolo
Nightmares, bad stomach, early morning angst have given way to a beautiful day. I have had way to much good coffee. I attend my last yoga class today. At 7pm there is meditation. Then it's off to prepare for tomorrow's travel to Oaxaca. I go through the mountains tomorrow. It should be an interesting day. I will stay in Oaxaca through my birthday. My 60th. Lots of stuff rummaging through my mind right now. It is almost impossible to stay in the moment. The future looms large. The trip i s not half over. I do not know which road to take home. I want to avoid the megapolis of Mexico City but how to do this is yet a mystery. Teotihuacan is just outside the city so I will get close but if I find a way I'll avoid the place. I will not go back the way I came till I hit Texas. Then it's to Florida and Alex (my brother) in Sarasota. If all goes well I'll leave the bike there and fly home.
Here's what I've learned so far. As much as my uncertainty is ever present I find I can accomplish anything if I keep my wits and maintain patience. I'm glad I don't drink. This trip would have seemed easier if I had been drinking but I would have easily put myself in jeopardy had I done so. Yes the trials and tribulations have been difficult but drinking over them would have temporarily soothed the savage beast but it would have taken its toll on my well being and physical strength which I need to ride the bike. There is a huge difference between riding a motorcycle here and driving. In a car you have less to worry about. You are are encapsulated. On a bike you feel everything. You see everything. You are more aware of the dangers and the beauty. An 8 hour day on a bike in Mexico is much more a test of wits than driving a car.
Tomorrow I leave the ashram. I will be sad to leave but don't feel the compulsion to stay. When I travel it always seems like there's too much more to see. To sit and rest doesn't seem like an option. I'm never on vacation when I'm on vacation. It takes up all my time to figure things out the way I travel. I mean to find the ashram, which costs $15 per day and includes breakfast and lunch, one has to work for it. But the rewards are great. I stayed three days at the ashram. A record for me. I plan on really staying awhile in Oaxaca. At least till my birthday. Hopefully longer. I must quench the thirst to blast home. I am homesick as hell but I needn't be. Nothing there will have changed. It'll be cold. I'll have to cut and split wood. Figure out how to make some money and plan for the next trip. This trip was a precursor to others.
Last night during meditation it was clear that I had to cut this trip short. Not only am I running short of the energy it takes to deal with fearsome roads and traffic but I saw clearly that my next move is to finish my house. I made enough money this summer to pay for this trip. So this first experiment is just that, an experiment. Now the goal is clear, do it again but better. Hence the desire to get home. Every day I stay here is more money I could spend on the house. If I play my cards right I can finish the house with the money I have left. Again the future is always a dream. It is a shadow it can never be touched because once you touch the future it becomes the present.
Right now the present is awesome. Another nice cafe. Good coffee and three empanadas for $5. Right on the square. I know as soon as I get home I'll want to be back here. That's the trick to traveling the way I do; I scare myself half to death then its over and I want to do it again.
